“I Don’t Owe Them Anything.”
Yes, You Do.
Stop Using the Excuse “I Don’t Owe Them Anything.”
Although I have experienced this more with people in Generation Z, I have heard a wide variety of people say the phrase, “I don’t owe them anything.” It has almost become a cultural mantra. I am sorry to say, but yes you do. There are so many situations in which this phrase is used. Whether it’s referring to a romantic relationship, a friendship, a coworker, etc., so many people think that they do not owe anybody anything. This could not be further from the truth.
We See a Rise in the “I Don’t Owe Them Anything” Epidemic, But Why?
You Owe Something To Everyone.
No matter who the person is that you are referring to, you owe so much to every single person in your life. You owe everyone basic respect, decency, and accountability. The notion that you do not “owe people anything” is insanely contradictory to everything philosophers and sociologists have learned about community. It is an insult to humanity to claim you are not indebted to others. These key values, such as respect and accountability, are owed to EVERYONE by EVERYONE.
One of the Most Obvious Examples of This Instance is With a Romantic Relationship.
We often hear the term “I don’t owe them anything” when referring to a romantic partner you are no longer interested in seeing. It is very easy for most people to simply cut somebody off without letting that person know why you no longer are communicating with them. But this can be absolutely detrimental to the other person. Expressing to someone your issues or reservations with them gives such a piece of mind, but not only that, you OWE it to them. Even outside of romantic relationships, you owe communication and accountability to every person you have any kind of a relationship with. This includes your boss, coworkers, etc. When someone asks for your help, even if you don’t think they deserve it, it is important to be there for them.
From experience, I believe that the main issue is people's lack of communication, or even a lack of knowing how to properly communicate. One of the most obvious problems is people not knowing how to set their boundaries until it is too late. If someone is making you uncomfortable, you owe it to them to let them know. The small, uncomfortable conversations that we all love to avoid are actually the things we “owe” each other. When somebody oversteps, hurts us, etc., it is so easy to just never want to talk to them again. But, people deserve a “why.” Being able to simply discuss what the problem is will show you exactly why you owe everyone something.
16th Nov. 2025
Elizabeth Cox
